苦女孩 发表于 2013-10-26 23:13:10



用了两次 ON THE OTHER HAND，LZ 有第三只手吗？

其他的~~我不是英语大牛，就不乱说了！


康熙邓 发表于 2013-10-27 10:55:19




看错了吧，就一处～


心乱如麻那 发表于 2013-10-27 15:18:45



6.5吧，上7分有难度


康熙邓 发表于 2013-10-27 23:12:27




如果一鸭写作能有6.5，我就心满意足啦～


kitjkalpra 发表于 2013-10-28 07:56:07



多用however做插入语表转折 . 'On the other hand, there are some concerns about these classes' - concerns, however, have also been raised with regard to attending extra classes.

It is not difficult to understand what you tried to say, the sentence structure/wording, however, needs improvement.  
  


康熙邓 发表于 2013-10-28 12:55:08




嗯，谢谢，很中肯，的确是需要在一些搭配上多改进～


fobq6714 发表于 2013-10-28 13:18:45



写作上7简直是要老命啊。


页: 1 [2]
查看完整版本: 大家有空帮忙指点下我的这篇写作啊